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>State of the Union: Iffy

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In case you missed it, the Bohunk has dug up a highlight reel, if you will, of the 2011 State of the Union address which aired last night. (Jersey Shore was on, so many youngsters did not tune it, I’m told) The video included here is just one-sixth of the one hour and two minute speech that hopped from the economy, the Tucson shootings, Iran, North Korea, the Super Bowl, education and most of the other problems facing the US today. Below are some notes I took (I didn’t really take notes) of the speech as it touched on certain points. Also, look at my timeline on Twitter for minute by minute tweets as the SOTU happened. Yes, the Bohunk has that little going on.

No one yelled “You Lie!” but Biden did call for “Free Bird”…

 

~Note: Boehner must have turned his tanning bed up to eleven…He looks like a leather chair.

~Obama encouraged Americans to become teachers; every unemployed, underpaid teacher moaned.

~Boehner, constantly on camera, looked inattentive and full of burning hate, though, in his defense, the burning was a result of a male Polynesian prostitute he slapped in the men’s room a few weeks ago.

~If you look closely, Biden has a woman’s name and phone number written on his left hand. Way to go, Joe.

~John McCain has aged terribly in the past two years…but so has Obama.

~It took an hour, but yes, Boehner did, finally, cry, with just eight minutes left in the speech. You almost faked some dignity! Hard to be a hard-ass when you tear up just by being mentioned by the President, the man you vehemently oppose.

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>Sportsperson of the Year, A Crying Republican, and the End of Favre…

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It is finally time to name the 2010 Bohunk Sportsperson of the Year…Read on to find out who the lucky SOB is, and what they think of their prestigious honor…

First, a quick introduction to the new Speaker of the House, the very, unabashedly-Republican John Boehner. The person (he has not been elevated to Gentleman status by the Bohunk) from Ohio was once a janitor and has risen to become the second person in line to become President of these United States of America. Boehner is known for his ‘old school’ Republican associations, and being well ingrained with elements of the established GOP, as opposed to the Tea Partiers who recently stormed the polls to join him in next years Congress. Unfortunately for Boehner, he is known not just for his politics, but primarily for his crying. Twice while being interviewed on ABC News he broke down into a stammering incoherence. Fellow politicians, including Nancy Pelosi, claim that Boehner frequently breaks down while discussing proposed bills in committee meetings.For those who watch CSPAN (all four of you) Boehner has cried while giving speeches on numerous occasions, including the video below. It is worth noting that when women cry in politics, it is taken as a sign of weakness; Hilary Clinton dropped a tear in her 2008 primary stop in New Hampshire and was roundly criticized. Men, however, are called compassionate when they let it all come out. This is a double-standard that needs to be looked at, especially when it applies to the Speaker of the House. (Nancy Pelosi, it should be noted, has never cried while in office. She is a hard-ass)

Wants to save the American people from terrorism, but voted against a cancer bill that would make insurance companies pay costs of chemotherapy. Note to Americans…Don’t get cancer.

The Bohunk is honored to present Mr. Ted King the coveted Sportsperson of the Year award in its inaugural edition. Ted King is a rare gem; cyclist, blogger, chef and Tweeter-extraordinaire. As a member of the Coolest Looking Cycling Squad Ever, Cervelo TestTeam, he graced the Italian roads in not one but two Giro d’Italias, and has consistently “rocked the party that rocks the pinata” while offering up some hefty servings of blogging nourishment. While he is a heck of a cyclist, Ted is also a heck of a human being. Ted’s commitment to the Krempels Center, an organization committed to improving the lives of those suffering from a brain injury or damage, is one of the coolest athlete-cause hook-ups in modern times. Along with Cutaway Clothing, all proceeds from iamnottedking stickers and half of the cost of shirts go directly to the Krempels Center. And since none of you are Ted King, the iamnottedking clothing line is essentially personalized. As always, you can see Ted’s blog and Cutaway Clothing by selecting the corresponding link in the right hand column of my blog. Upon being notified of his impending (and awesome) award, Ted said, “It (nearly) brings a tear to my eye… The culmination of so much struggle and strife, I am humbled by such a dubious title.” Head over to Ted’s blog (click here if you are too lazy to look on the right) to see pictures and intriguing commentary from the Tedly from his current stay in Italy with his new squad, Liquigas-Cannondale. Congrats, Ted, and enjoy Italy. Thank you for being such an impeccable Gentleman…


Ah, the life of a professional cyclist…Thanks for being such a swell fella, Ted, and all
the best in 2011…The Bohunk will keep everyone Updated on your adventures…

In a huge blow against a potential national healthcare bill, a Virginia State court ruled that the mandate which requires most of the US population to be covered by some amount of insurance is unconstitutional and must be stricken from any potential bill. The law in Virginia states that no citizens, for any reason, should be forced to buy insurance. The judge on the case stated that the mandate’s stipulation that a citizen being forced to buy insurance is “beyond the historical reach of the US Constitution” and is unlawful. Experts agree that an appeal is imminent and the case will almost certainly end up on the desk of the Supreme Court. Recent research shows that up to 15% of the US population is uninsured, a total that makes up roughly 45 million Americans. The mandate was included to ensure that the number of under or uninsured Americans would drastically decrease, and provide coverage for the poor and poverty-stricken working class. The Bohunk would kindly remind the state of Virginia that only one in four Virginians have employer-sponsored insurance…The rest are either covered by a spouse or purchase their own insurance anyway…

In one last shameless plug, the Bohunk beseeches thee to click here to buy my new short story, West. For a whopping $2 bill, you can get an eBook so awesome your computer screen will actually get a little brighter.

Richard “Bulldozer” Holbrook died this morning after undergoing heart surgery to repair his aorta valve. Holbrook was 69 years old. He is best known for his masterful and delicate construction of the Dayton Peace Accords which ended the ethnic turmoil during the dissipation of Yugoslavia. The Accords were signed December 14, 1995. In 2008, Holbrook was brought aboard the Obama Administration’s foreign policy team as a special representative to Afghanistan and Pakistan, with the cumbersome task of stabilizing the region and fighting terrorism. His abrasive style (you don’t get nicknamed “Bulldozer” for being patient) did not win many friends in the year and a half he worked in Central Asia, but diplomats from all nation’s involved were impressed by his tenacity and work ethic. Holbrook has worked as a diplomat for the US government for every administration since John F. Kennedy and has been involved in the Vietnam War and every US conflict till the present day. Holbrook is reported to have discussed tensions in Afghanistan with a Pakistani doctor as he was being sedated for his surgery; his last comment was, “You’ve got to stop this war in Afghanistan.”

For the first time in 18 years and 84 days, Brett Favre did not start for his football team. After suffering a shoulder injury last week, rumors swirled about the “Ol’ Gunslinger’s” ability to make his 298th consecutive start against the G-Persons. First, he had the luck of the Metrodome’s roof collapsing, giving him an extra day to heal up. Second, it is Brett Favre; the guy just heals up. But, alas, it was not to be. Favre was put on the injured reserve just hours before kick-off and was inactive for the game Monday night in Detroit. For some perspective, I draw upon a comment made by a young friend named Riley. He stated, with, I can imagine, a glistening tear upon his cheek, that for the first time in his entire life Brett Favre was not starting a football game during the regular season. The only other times he wasn’t playing on Sunday was a result of a playoff loss or a Monday Night game. Favre leads he league in interceptions and inappropriate text messages this season while the Hyperboreans’ hopes of the playoffs are essentially non-existent, though mathematically there is still a (very) long shot. It is now time for Favre to limp and hobble off into the sunset, as he should have done three years ago, his legendary name still intact…

That’s it for the Bohunk, thanks for reading and have a glorious Tuesday everyone. Congrats, again, to Ted King and stay tuned for the rest of the month for the rest of the Bohunk Awards…