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Astronomers Discover Tatooine; Jar Jar Binks Still Eludes Arrest For Ruining First Two Movies

"Luke, use the Kepler space telescope to discover those binary stars...." ~ Not What Obi-Wan Said

A long time ago, in a conference room far, far away  in Jackson Hole, Wyoming (the Bohunk’s birthplace, you’ll remember) scientists announced the discover of a planet we already know. Tatooine, or as it’s officially known Kepler 16b after the planetary system is located within, wakes each day with two stars, rotating alongside each other while the planet, far off, revolves around them. Each day on the planet’s surface must be eerily similar to the scene in Star Wars: A New Hope when Luke, a dashingly good-looking farm boy looks out over the desert under two setting suns.

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UFOs Sightings Up 67%, History Channel Reputation Plummets

Look! A potential intergalactic phenomena!

The UFO and conspiracy theorists have been active lately. So active, in fact, that over 500 UFO sightings have been reported a month, up roughly 67% . The Mutual UFO Network, the world’s largest and wealthiest UFO research organisation, says that reports of sightings have been on the rise, especially over the US and Canada. The organization says that while 95% of UFO sightings can be easily explained away, the remaining 5% pose a serious and intriguing question for the scientific community.

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The Star That Changed It All

V1 In Orbit

In 1923, Edwin Hubble was rather sure he was onto something. The young man was already revolutionizing the field of astronomy, discovering celestial bodies at an unrivaled pace and turning conventional wisdom on its head at nearly every turn. But now Hubble was outdoing himself all over again.

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