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Obama Impersonator Yanked From GOP Back-Slapping Conference

The GOP gathered to count their money and rev themselves up for the 2012 election campaign by raising funds and slapping backs at the Republican Leadership Conference in New Orleans this weekend. In what has to be simply bad taste, they hired a comedian, Reggie Brown, who makes his living telling jokes whilst dressed as President Barack Obama. They were, of course, shocked when Mr. Brown started telling jokes about the President and GOP candidates like Mitt Romney and Tim Pawlenty.

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>Itchy Kardashian, Unintelliegent Design and a Bananahammock…

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In a nation where divorce is commonplace and the new trend of prolonged cohabitation is widely accepted, it is no real surprise to hear that 40% of Americans believe marriage is obsolete. Things, if you have not been paying attention, have changed; women do not need marriage to support themselves or their children, both sexes are more likely to put marriage off in order to pursue a career, and the stigma of children born out of wedlock has greatly dissipated. This has actually brought out what we might view as a positive; women are more likely to cite “true love” as their deciding factor to wed or not, roughly 78% saying this was the most important part of a marriage. Just 30 years ago, in the late 1970’s, just 28% of women cited love as the deciding factor. 57% of women, at that time, claimed that “monetary” issues would decide who they would marry. So, contrary to what we might think, women are more likely to marry for love than money in the new century. (Some gold digging hussy DID NOT pay me to write this)

The question was posed last evening on Facebook, which read as follows: In the 70’s, Richard Nixon’s chief campaign advisor proposed buying yachts to serve as “floating brothels” to lure and blackmail Democrats who would be attending that election year’s DNC. This was while he was a member of a sitting President’s staff. And paid by tax dollars. Can you name this crooked son of a gun? If you guessed Gordon G. Liddy, you’re right! and probably at least 45 years of age. That’s right. Liddy also proposed murdering several writers of The Washington Post, kidnapping the children of Congressmen, and breaking into the…oh, well, he actually did that one.


G. Gordon Liddy…Facist, Republican, and Closeted….

Troubling news for the American servicemen and women stationed in South Korea this morning, as reports indicated that North and South Korean troops have exchanged hundreds of artillery rounds over S. Korea’s Yeonpyeong Island. Two S. Korean soldiers were killed with others injured. North Korean casualties are unknown. North Korea’s state news program stated it began firing on the island in response to South Korea’s weapons firing, a regularly scheduled drill where rounds fell harmlessly into the ocean.

In the ongoing battle for Top Sexually Transmitted Disease, gonorrhea has dropped in popularity. Make way for the new King of STDs…(drum roll)….Chlamydia! The nasty disease afflicts roughly 2.8 million Americans (2.5 if you take into account that Kim Kardashian gets it over and over and over again) which makes up a large portion of those who claim to be sexually active. Cases of syphilis are up 39% (gross) since 2006, primarily in homosexual couples, though almost 20 times more likely to be found in African American circles than any other race. It all boils down to a very simple fact; 1 in 4 sexually active Americans has or has had a STD. So get tested.


In the eternal words of the Broheim, “You just KNOW that
she’s itchy….” One imagines so, yes.

The tragic death toll in Cambodia has risen to at least 378. Citizens celebrating a local water festival stampeded over a narrow bridge spanning the Bassac River, crushing bodies underneath and pushing others off into the river below. State television cameras caught the entire repulsive scene on tape- both the living and the dead being twisted and mashed under a mass of bodies screaming and searching for escape. No one is certain what caused the panic; some claim hearing police sirens, and still others say the stampede began as people realized the size of the mass around them. Police say this is not the end count of deaths; many believe more bodies will be found in the river, and the 755 wounded are still being treated in several area hospitals.

In another installment in my ongoing series, the World Is Going to Hell Via Hand Basket, a poll released from 2006 states that 68% of Republican voters do not believe “in any aspect” the FACT of evolution. The Bohunk doe not like saying the “theory” of evolution, because its modern form has been essentially confirmed in all explorations. Yet, over two thirds of adult, somewhat educated Americans do not believe in FACT. Calling evolution “theory” is just as insulting to evolution as calling “intelligent design” science is to science; one is proven, well studied explanation of human history, and the other is the moronic (and dumb) statement of, “This all powerful being did it, duh!” which negates all the rules of science, physics and biology. And we just elected dozens of Republicans who claim to believe in “intelligent design” to Congress. (Note: They believe in intelliegent design, but not climate change)


Simple can, at times, just be plain stupid.

On this day in 1859, William H. Bonney, though much better know by the ultimate bad-ass nickname, “Billy the Kid”, was born in  a squalid Irish immigrant neighborhood in New York City. The outlaw killed 27 men in the American West, the most famous being Sheriff Bill Brady, who okayed the murder of the Kid’s boss, John Tunstall. In 1881, Sheriff Garrett, a friend of Billy’s before he was a lawman, snuck into a house near Fort Sumner, New Mexico. While Billy was asleep next to a girlfriend of his, Garrett fired a bullet into his chest and killed him. The Kid was 21 years old. And if you want to see a freakin’ awesome movie about Billy the Kid and his band of regulators, check out Young Guns. It’s got the coach from Mighty Ducks in it. (Emilio Estevez)

That’s it, thanks for reading. There may or may not be an Update tomorrow, so check in anyway. Have a great Thanksgiving, nonetheless.